At the end of a very arduous and extremely treacherous 11
mile hike, there exists a utopian paradise the likes of which I have never
experienced until Tess and I hiked the absolutely breathtaking (in more ways
than one)
Kalalau Trail,
along the
Na
Pali Coast.
 |
| The absolutely breathtaking Na Pali Coast |
Our guidebook gave us very little insight into this hike or what exists at the end. Had I known more, I would probably have gone a lil’ overboard on the planning and possibly psyched myself out of even doing it in the first place. I also would have planned a longer stay at the end, possibly…6 months?
 |
| Kalalau Beach |
What makes this hike particularly
treacherous are the narrow passages along and around some of the bluffs, such
as the infamous Crawler’s Ledge, where any slip will lead to a brief tumble
down several hundred feet of rock-face and terminating with drowning in the sea
below. To make these passages more terrifying, there are unpredictable and
forceful gusts of wind blasting around these cliffs. That sucks when you have a
large and cumbersome pack strapped to your back. We ran into some forceful and
unnerving gusts while on Crawler’s Ledge.
Here is a video of Crawler's Ledge, shot by someone else.
Other dangers include loose crumbly soil which turns
relatively harmless sections of the trail into death-traps for the
non-sure-footed. When it rains (which luckily we didn’t have to deal with), you
can imagine how the danger level escalates; the rock becomes slippery and the
soil turns into extremely slick mud.
On the return trip there were times where we had to take
breaks to overcome vertigo caused by a combination of tunnel-vision (from
staring at the ground while hiking) along with the ebb and flow of the waves
(far below, but in our periphery).
After passing up and down several valleys, around several
rock faces, and across 2 rivers, the trail terminates at the pristine
Kalalau Beach in the absurdly
beautiful
Kalalau
Valley. If you have seen Jurassic Park, you are familiar with the scenery
along the Na Pali coast (atleast from the vantage point of a helicopter), as
the landscapes of the Jurassic Park island were shot there.
 |
| The backdrop of Kalalau Beach |
The Creatures
 |
| lil' salamander |
 |
We ran into a family of goats.
Luckily I could smell them before I saw them, b/c the dad-goat was nothing to be messed with. |
 |
| These softball size toads came out at night. |
 |
| 10 inch centipede! |
The Beach
During the days we spent time chillin on the beach, soaking in the sun’s powerful rays, and cooling off in the pristine (albeit irradiated by
Fukushima) water. But mostly I spent my time staring at the absurd and incomprehensibly beautiful scenery, trying to convince myself that it was indeed reality; that a place this perfect does in fact exist.
 |
| The water source. |
Since the lifestyle is so laid back, the beach so secluded, and the mentality so carefree (with the savagery of dwelling in a tropical paradise having pervaded the mind), clothing seemingly becomes less of necessity and more a society-mandated encumbrance. In most places/situations, this would likely take
away from the beauty of the surroundings, but here in paradise (of course) everyone one was young, fit, and irrationally attractive.
The Residents
In addition to the many hikers who make the journey for a
temporary visit, there is also a population of unpermitted and illegal
residents in the valley. Although the native Hawaiians left the valley in the
early 20th Century, there are now an unknown number of hippies
entrenched up in the forest, who subsist off the land and raise their families
in this paradise. While they mostly keep to themselves and go about their own
business, they are seen around; at the water source, on the beach, and
traveling around the valley. They are each living out there for their individual
reasons and interact to different degrees: some are loners, but I get the
feeling that many are very community-oriented.
To provide for themselves and their families they grow vegetables
(among other things) in secret gardens hidden up in the valley, gather food
(prawns, muscles, etc), I assume some of them hunt (wild goats and feral pigs),
and occasionally they make the long trip back to civilization to buy necessities.
 |
| We talked to this nice dude on his way back in with his supplies. I decided to make him anonymous, since he was nice enough to let us take his picture. He has been out there living on his own for ~4 months. |
Nightlife
Don’t think that just because the locale is remote and
the living primitive, doesn’t necessarily mean that there aren’t interesting
and civilized things to do!
Blood Moon
On the 1
st night we watched the lunar eclipse at
an ancient
heiau with a mix of
valley locals (“valley people” as they are known) and hikers. When we arrived
at this gathering, we were each offered a piece of peanut butter cake, which we
were promised was not spiked and which was served to us with a machete by a mysterious
cloaked individual in the dark. Now, as tempting as it was to trip-out to the Blood
Moon at a late night séance held in an ancient Hawaiian temple with a bunch of
forest-dwelling recluses, it
had been
a very long day, and we had grown far too weary for such an adventure, so we
pretended to eat it and chucked it into the woods for good measure. The whole
event actually turned out far less exciting than its potential, as the eclipse
was somewhat obscured by clouds, and the gathering had far less fire, dancing, and/or sacrifices than I had assumed. Perhaps if we hadn’t retired
early, and had eaten the peanut butter cake it could have been more epic(?),
but all in all, not a bad night.
Movie Night
On the 2
nd night we caught a showing of
Wolf
of Wall Street. This guy Rich, (who has hiked the trail “hundreds of
times”, knows most of the locals, and has the most interesting stories I have
ever heard) packed in a micro projector
and a speaker for the showing. The only thing better than the novelty of seeing
a movie projected on a tarp deep in the woods at a hippie camp, was watching
that specific movie with
that specific community. It was an
interesting dichotomy to watch a movie that glorifies
extreme greed, with people who reject most everything about modern
society. A few of them left during the movie due to moral objections to the
content. The awkward silence was painful at times.
We ended up staying an extra day in the Kalalau Valley by
rationing our food and mooching off new-found friends.
 |
| Our new friends Billy and Jess |
Dinner Date
On the 3
rd
night we had a dinner date with two super nice/friendly people (naturally
Canadians) who we met on the trail and who offered us food so we could stay longer!
They were Kevin (who has hiked the trail 7 times over the last 15 years) and
Moya (who is one of the
top female
foosball players in the world!). They prepared a multi-course feast fit for
a king, featuring freshly-gathered
Opihi (which are kinda
like a cross between an oyster and a barnacle)! And then we spent the evening
admiring the constellations, which I have
never
seen so clearly.
 |
| Our friends gathered Opihi for dinner. |
 |
| cooking up the Opihi |
Anyway, I think this hike was by far the most strenuous, dangerous,
and rewarding thing I have ever done.
An absolutely amazing experience. It was the best part of the most refreshing vacation I have ever taken. Just like everyone who has made this journey,
I vow that I will one day make it back.
There is one more Kauai post:
Allerton Gardens.
.jpg)
